Things are really good this week. Really, really good. My head is feeling clearer and I’m finally able to focus a bit more at work (any day now I can tell my boss he doesn’t need to leave post-its everywhere for fear I’ll forget something). I don’t think it can be the reduced meds yet, I’ve barely started, although for sure even knowing that I’m soon to be finished with them is helping.
Mostly I feel lucky, and grateful. Myself and Hubby were chatting this morning on the way to work, about the things that are important in life, the things that matter. It wasn’t a state of the nation by any means, and came about off the back of talking about decisions that friends have had to make in the last while, and may yet have to make. Tough, life changing decisions. It made us realise that whatever difficulties we’ve had to go through this last year, there is a lot we can rely on. It’s not the material things that matter right now. It’s the things that make us smile, want to get up in the morning, look forward to going home in the evening. It’s the great friends that we have, the community we live in. The natural beauty of where we live, that never fails to amaze me every time I look at it. (I realise I’m waxing lyrical here a little but it’s Friday and I’m in good form, indulge me!!) We are lucky enough to have security at work, and you can’t put a price on the peace of mind that brings. Mostly, I think (I hope) we’re nearing the end of the tunnel. Our relationship is rock solid. We’re making each other laugh again, we’re chatting – we’re friends!! God I’ve missed that.
The last few years brought us to our knees, made us question absolutely everything. At times it was virtually impossible to keep going. Yet here we are. I’d like to think that this is actually the end of the tunnel, that depression will leave us alone from now on. Maybe it will, maybe it won’t. But I’ve no way of knowing that, and right now, I’m not prepared to spend any more time thinking about it, it’s taken up far too much energy already. So, today, at the beginning of my 30th(ish) year, I’m looking forward to better times and that feels really, really good.