Today I am pooped. Full on, eyes want to close, can’t concentrate, pooped. This post is a reminder to me, and maybe any of you who fall into the same category – it’s much, much harder to resist the pull of depression when I’m tired, BUT, that doesn’t mean I’m getting depressed again. 

Me when my phone rang this morning
I saw Therapist yesterday, and was telling her about the extremes of mood I’m experiencing, and the sudden drop off. She asked one very simple question – does it happen at the same time every day? Yes, it does. In the afternoon. When I’m starting to get tired. So simple, so obvious, yet it never occurred to me (which is why I still need to pay someone to bring these things to my attention). So now I know. Tiredness is one of my biggest pitfalls when it comes to staying well with depression. When I’m tired, all of my energy goes into normal, day to day functioning, and there’s nothing left for the extra effort it normally takes to keep floating and keep a low mood at bay.

So how can I make this better? Sleep!!! That’s it. Sounds simple but tends to be problematic for me. We all know that in order to get the best sleep that we can, we should have the same routine before bed every night. We should also not watch TV to close to trying to sleep, stay away from gadgets (I’m chronic for being on the interweb right up till I want to sleep), not exercise too late in the day………………..etc etc. In an ideal world this would work fine. In this world, it’s going to take some effort. Tonight, I’m determined to get to bed early. I’ve downloaded a sleep app – I know, I know, still a gadget, but it’s something to listen to rather than look at. I’m going to try that and see if it helps. Knowing that tiredness is a problem is half the battle. But remembering that as I get more tired, and having the wherewithal to do something about it before the problem gets any bigger, that’s a different ball game altogether, and one that I don’t plan on playing anytime soon. 

This article has 9 Comments

  1. Oh you are so not the only one! I tried bribing myself by buying bath bombs the other week but with the condition that the latest I could use them was 10pm and I had to go to bed after. It was partially successful. It took me 10 days to use them both and the first time I extended my deadine by 20mins then lay in the bath for about 90 seconds before wondering what one does in a bath. I think I spent half my first pregnancy in the bath but have subsequently lost the knack. The second time I took a book with me. One to practice for me at least maybe. Hope the slep app goes well.
    Ps we have our wifi set to automatically set to turn off at midnight, which is a) too late and b) just prompts an automatic log on the hotspot, but it should work in theory. I want an app where you can set a countdown internet time that flashes warning when nearly up then logs you out and won't let you back on for a predetermined time.

    1. Baths always sound great in theory but my bathroom is usually full of clothes horses and wet washing and bath toys………not the most conducive to relaxation!! That and I find having to get up and get ready for bed actually wakes me up……..
      I think the sleep app will be best bet, that and a good book. Used to devour books but I've really gotten out of the habit lately. Will have to try again. Fingers crossed for sleep for us both tonight!

    2. I really enjoyed Night Waking by Sarah Moss recently. It really captures some of the worst aspects of being a mum to small children, in a funny way. It was a relief to read about someone worse than me, albeit a fictional someone.

  2. I just found your blog yesterday and am really glad about this discovery! 🙂 Ive been living with depression for years and it does help to read how other people deal with this piece of sh…Im looking forward to your next posts! All the best.

    1. Thanks Steffen, that means a lot. I know myself I'm guilty of reading posts and really getting something from them, but I don't always comment, so thank you for taking the time to do that. Good to know we're all in this together!

  3. As someone who had ME for many years, I'm a great believer in the art of pacing oneself and recognising that tiredness is the price to be paid for overdoing things. It involves huge discipline, especially when one has a wadge of responsibilities but it is very doable, like most other things, if one recognises the importance of it. Sleep becomes elusive when one is over-tired so I think it's all about 'preventing' the exhaustion in the first place and winding down ahead of the tiredness.

    1. Agreed. I packed myself off to bed as soon as we got the kids settled last night, and had the light out shortly after 9. Feel a lot more human for it today, although I know I need more. Definitely a lot of discipline involved.

  4. I slept my way through depression the first year, going to bed when the little one does, at 8, but waking during the night lots of times. Now I'm pooped at 10 on a good day, but I sleep through the night ( as long as my daughter does too ).
    But I also need to eat on time, as my sugar levels drop I get aggitated and short tempered ( even more than usual haha) so if I eat during the day ( I want cookies but I try to be good and have a banana or apple) ( except when my periods due) and that at least tends to keep me awake during the afternoon dip.
    Oh and plants vs zombies before bedtime on the ipad makes a very nice change from counting sheep ; -)

    Annemiek

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